They're All Gonna Laugh At You!

I have to write this now while it's still fresh in my mind.

I just got home from seeing Kimberly Peirce's adaptation of 'Carrie.' First, I need to ask if the spelling of her last name bothered anyone else as much as it's bothering me. Anyway though, I may be biased because I saw and loved the original. I also had to remind myself that it was a book before it was a movie.

However, they fell short in a number of ways.

1. Julianne Moore was nowhere near the bible-thumping creep of a Margaret White that Piper Laurie was. That is number one because it's the most important. If you take away Carrie's mom, it's just a movie about bullying and retaliation. Margaret White is the one thing that allowed Carrie to be a part of the horror genre. Piper Laurie's portrayal of that character scared and continues to scare the bejeezus out of me.

2. Chloe Morentz is far too gorgeous to be a believable Carrie White. Not that pretty girls can't be bullied, I was. (*yes, I think I'm pretty.) However, I think a Dakota Fanning or someone with an odd look about their face would have been more believable. Cause Sissy Spacek was less than desirable. (Yet again, I have to remind myself... it was a book first.)

3. "I might have known it would be red." While it's become a memorable line.. if you watched the special features on the original film, you'd know that it was an unplanned change. The line was to read "red." They decided during filming that a pale pink fit the overall prom look better. The script was never changed and it added to the delusion that is Margaret White, so they kept it. Maybe them keeping her dress pink in the remake only bothered me because I knew that useless fact.

4. Ms. DesJardin doesn't die. Nevermind that she doesn't die in the book. Nevermind they changed her name in the original so you could say that she's a completely different character. She dies in the original film and for some reason I really wanted her to die in this one.

Overall, I applaud Chloe for taking on this role. As such a young actress, it could have been a very terrible thing. I think this was a good move for her. I also think Julianne Moore would have been awesome if Piper Laurie hadn't done it first. I really just don't think it should have happened at all though. Hollywood should just leave things alone. Quit with the remakes! Ya know?

& nevermind that I saw it with someone that hadn't seen the original & wouldn't stop talking. That's another post for another day.

Oh! and how could I forget all those super extra hand movements they had that girl doing. Ugh. I don't even think there are words for the stress that caused me. Too much. Much too much.

Apt. 217

If you've ever visited my apartment, you'd have heard stories about how I've never met any of my neighbors. You'd also have heard about the random Aldi shopping cart that likes to kick it in the hallway.

Today though, after living here for 15 months, I held a door open for the tranny in apartment 217.

To Be Continued...

there once was a man from the cape..

I'm broke. I'm sad. I'm dead.

It's an insane feeling to have and then to just... not. This time last year, I found myself in a situation I didn't see myself getting out of. I was barely making ends meet with my two jobs and I was either going to be homeless or move back in with my parents. Then I met a man with a dog. Haha. Not really but I did meet a man. A man with a hard face but gentle eyes. A man who wanted to get to know me better for reasons that remain unknown. He said I would never have to worry about money again. He promised.

First he gave me $500 cash to pay "his half" of my rent. Then that $500 turned to $1000 turned to $2000. I started saving it. Knowing he wouldn't be there forever. He was married. Surely she'd find out and he'd disappear. I'd seen this movie before. At first though, he was just an awesome friend. A man with a dog. Slowly, we both caught feelings. Bad idea.

Well, a couple months ago, after I told him I wouldn't be moving into his condo.. I decided to break off all ties. We agreed that he'd give me only $1000/month until the first of the year and then no more.

Now it's November. I just liquidated my savings to pay my rent and I have $66 to my name. What happened? I don't know. I take this as a lesson learned. Don't take things from a man with a dog. The dog will one day die. It'll be a terrible thing.

Back to square one.

Tall Girl Problems #001

November 1. Rent is due & I'm feelin some type of way about it.

The Halloween hoopla is finally over so that means:

1. All the candy is 75% off!

2. Starbucks has their holiday cups and Christmas drinks.

3. It's about to be cold as all the fucks, here in Michigan.

4. I have to get back in gym mode so I can work off Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner. (+ all them NYE dranks.)

Faaaaaaaaawk!

But let's get back to Halloween. This week was great. Filled with great drinks, better food, good people and real laughs (accompanied by a couple edibles). I also learned quite a bit about myself.

I learned that I care too much about the advancement of other people and too little about my own. I learned that I have some great people in my life that believe in me more than I believe in myself and inspire me to believe in myself more. I learned that a quarter of a weed rice krispie treat is too much and will put me in a coma on a futon spooning a puppy. I learned that I'm not about this straight hair life. My hair doesn't fuck with Michigan elements. I learned that falling on concrete at a Halloween party hurts like a bitch and my lightskinned ass and elbow and hands don't appreciate that shit. But 

Oh! & I got flowers. Just because flowers. That was a big deal and a great way to start my week. I've never received flowers just because. They were beautiful. 

Now I just need to find a date. Screw a boyfriend. I just want to go on a date. I want someone to pick me up, go to the movies and eat dinner with me (I'll pay for my damn self) and then take me home. Maybe that can be a Christmas gift. Haha. My life. So sad.

Take The Good With The Bad

"You're allowed to change your mind as many times as you like."

It's other people's minds I'd like to be able to change sometimes.

Mine generally stays the same. Work. Sleep. Coffee. Burton. Potter. Unrequited love. Same ol' shit.

They feel good and bad at the same time.

The inspiration to blog at 6am is a strange one. Leave it to Flaco to make that happen.

He gets me. That's why I keep him around. (Even though he spelled Slytherin wrong...)

"I don't know. It's all stupid. I don't wanna talk about it anymore."

"I'm just feeling very alone and very unwanted and taken for granted by a lot of people. That's the abridged version."

I hate when people ask me how I'm feeling cause I don't know if they really want the answer or if they're just being nice. Like when you say "hi, how are you?" in passing. So when Adam asked me, last night, how I was feeling I really didn't know how to respond. Something in me snapped though and so I gave him the full story. Or as much of it as my iPhone could handle.

"Why are you feeling that way? Am I one of those people?," he asked.

"Yeah. I mean, even though I don't feel like you do it intentionally. It's just all in my own interpretation of things but yes, you'd be one of those people. There are quite a few. It's not one specific thing from anyone that makes me feel that way, more like a combination of things. You have your own life. I'm not one of those people."

(Yes, I do have my own life but I'd like to think you're apart of it.)

"& I think that may be part of it. Maybe it is a communication thing at the core. & I think a big part of it is, I've always SUCKED at communication. You & I have talked about it a number of times. I've had discussions about it with others as well... & so now that I'm trying to better with that, it's not being reciprocated. Which sucks. & then I know people have their own lives, so I don't make a big deal about it... but that's where the part about feeling unwanted or taken for granted comes into play. I don't feel like I'm a part of anyone's life. Or at least an important or valued part. I'm kind of just there when it's convenient for other people. It's not something I enjoy talking about cause when I just read all of that back to myself, I think I sound crazy. It's just how I feel though. & that's the best way I can explain it. I don't think I've ever told anyone any of this. I've changed alot of myself for other people and it's not fun. It's like, 'oh! So and so won't be a part of my life because I can't communicate my feelings and thoughts, then I change that piece of myself and they still don't want to be there..' I guess I just feel like all of it, all that self reflection and transformation, was for nothing."

....moments later, I slid back into my hole.

"I don't know. It's all stupid. I don't wanna talk about it anymore."